200220

Let me start with a wee bio. My name is Rachel, and I live in Bonnie Scotland 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 I’m in my 40’s and my mum is 87. I’m a live in carer, who also has a fiancé who I see when I can. I’ve been a carer for years however, as when I was 16/17 ish, my father had a stroke. I helped care for him and he gradually did improve, but his speech never recovered. About 9 years or so back he was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and sadly passed 8 years ago this April. So, I have been caring for many years. My mum now has dementia, so the caring continues.

It’s all very complicated when dementia is around. There is no black and white, only a rainbow spectrum for you to traverse. There are times when you get a good laugh, of course. Mum and myself have always been friends, and still are for the most part. But there are also times when I’m not a friend, or her daughter. I’m a carer who comes in to help. At times, I’m one of many carers who help. I’m just relieved she still lets me care, and still lets me be her friend and daughter. It’s a privilege to be here for her, after all her years caring for me and my siblings.

Having only been diagnosed a week ago, there is much to put in place and resources to find. A dementia care worker and all that stuff… Hopefully things will start moving soon. There’s only so much help you can get before a diagnosis.

Why the strange post title? Some may get it already, but 20th February 2020 is the date mums (vascular) dementia was finally confirmed.

R, x